Australian law

At the end of a lovely trip with a rental car I switched on the wipers (instead of the indicators - I'll never get my head around it) and pulled over into a parking spot right in front of our door. In order to avoid a fine (they're ridiculously high in Australia) I rechecked the parking sign and it said unlimited parking on Sundays.

It was quite an unpleasant surprise when I returned to the car and saw a white, narrow note fluttering on the windscreen. Did I misread the sign? A double check confirmed that this wasn't the case. Took a loot at the note and to my astonishment I read the following:
Offence: FAIL TO PARK FACING DIRECTION OF TRAVEL - Fail to park vehicle facing in direction of travel (two way) - Australian road Rule 208(2)(a). 

Penalty: $ 58

WHAT? You must be joking! What is the danger of parking "not facing the direction of travel" on a quiet street? Having me drive on the left side of the road was a thousandfold more dangerous! I have yet to find a satisfactory explanation... But in Australia there is no mercy for criminals like me who dare spurn their orderly parking habits. So all I could do was pay the fine - not without a good deal of muttering though.

This incident sparked my interest in Australian laws, especially the silly ones. If you google silly laws + Australia a lot pops up - usually not stating in what act they are to be found. I am always careful with those kind of sources but most rumors were circulating around Queensland and Victoria. So I decided to concentrate on those two to see what I could find in the actual acts. Here is an excerpt:

Trading with pirates (Victoria)
These days pirates are a common occurence in Australia - easily recognized by the eye patch and peg leg. So it is very useful to have such a law. 
Just to be on safe side - I wouldn't recommend even giving them a chewing gum (pirates crave that). You might end up in prison for 10 years... 

Harnessing goats and slaughtering beasts (Victoria)
Whoever does the following commits and offence:

What most tourists don't know (and what is never written in any guide): Aussies love to drive their dogs and goats harnessed through a public place and subsequently slaughter the "beasts" on the spot to have a nice barbie (barbecue for the non Aussie speaking). Hence paragraph (c) is supplemented by (g). 
Nowadays the smart Victorians just harness kangaroos and sheep instead to avoid the law. They cannot kill them on the street however (unless they knock them over by a car)...

Smacking passengers (Criminal Code, Queensland)
Watch out if you're sitting next to a Queenslander in a car - if you don't put on your seatbelt or muck about he might lawfully slap, choke or kick you or use any other "reasonable force" to keep "good order" in the vehicle... Btw: fleeing to the back seat doesn't help - he is allowed to delegate the mistreatment.

Setting mantraps in Queensland (Criminal code) In Queensland it is officially allowed to set "spring guns, mantraps, or engines at night" to protect a dwelling house. As a husband in Queensland I'd always tell my wife when I'm coming home - being shot by a spring gun / "mantrapped" at 5 am would put a rather brisk end to an unanounced long night out.

Sweeping in Brisbane (Brisbane City Coucil - Streets, Bridges, Culverts etc.)
Footpaths in front of houses are to be swept daily before 8:30 am. Failing to do so could cost you up to $ 5000 and up to $ 500 for "each and every day during which the offence continues" - I am sure everybody in Brisbane dutifully contributes to clean streets before 8:30 am...

Since spit complicates sweeping considerably they have also issued the following law (with the same penalty as above!) ;)

No spitting in Brisbane

  

Whenever QLD is short on money I have the remedy: The police could patrol the Brisbane running festival and issue fines to all runners who blemish the streets with "nasal discharge" or by expecorating.

That is it for my crash course in Australian law. As you can see it has a firm grip on any situation in life! I hope you enjoyed it and remember: offences are very costly in Australia. Thus I will always face the direction of travel when parking, not trade with pirates and never drive a harnessed goat through Queensland (althogh it was my firm intent do do so of course)...

Two websites facilitated the search substantially:

news.com.au

melbourneaustralia.com.au 

Paragraphs are excerpts from the original acts which can be found on the respective state websites